Jokes *** BE AWARE MAY CAUSE OFFENCE***

The latest club craze is to fill a woman's vagina with vodka and then suck it out using a straw.
Doctors are warning about the dangers of minge drinking.

A farmer in Devon has made history by growing a field of dildos.
Unfortunately he's had a lot of trouble with squatters!

85% of Liverpudlian males say they enjoy sex in the shower........ the other 15% haven't been to prison yet.

Just bought a racehorse called 'My Face'. It may not be very fast, but I can't wait to hear all the women in the crowd screaming 'come on my face!'

I've just been to my first Muslim birthday party!
Musical chairs was a bit slow but f**k me, pass the parcel was fast!

2 Irish couples decide to swap partners.
Afterwards Paddy said to Murphy that's the best sex I've ever had, I wonder how the girls got on?

If mothers Celebrate mothers day,
fathers celebrate fathers day,
lovers celebrate valentines day,
do w*****rs celebrate palm sunday?

THE BBC HAVE SAID THAT BLACKS AND ASIANS ARE NOT REPRESENTED ENOUGH ON TV
SO THEY'RE PUTTING CRIMEWATCH ON TWICE A WEEK.

Just popped home, caught the plumber with his dick in the dog!
Can't believe the police won't do anything!
They said he was Corgi registered

blonde asks chemist "can i have some rectum deodorant"."no such thing"he replies.
"yes there is i have one in my bag,its empty"
she hands it to him,and he says "this is a normal stick of under arm deodorant"

the blond says "HELLO ,,BIG LETTERS ,, TO APPLY ,PUSH UP BOTTOM"!!!

Brilliant, never let it be said that you are a racist, homophobe, or just a very rude boy. You have managed to get them all upset